How To Deal With Mom Shaming

In a social media savvy world, it’s easy to find entire groups of people that either fiercely supports or opposes any topic you can think of (politics, diet, exercise, etc.).  Unfortunately, this is also a very harsh reality for all topics related to raising your baby and mommyhood.  This can not only make for a confusing and exhausting existence as a mom, but it can be downright depressing when “mom shaming” comes into the picture.  Whether you are being lashed out at or having trouble holding your tongue at someone’s opinion, here are some pointers to keep in mind to navigate today’s opinionated world.  

Don’t react.

As humans, we get easily defensive when our ideas and values are challenged.  These gut reactions are important when it involves our safety but it can be extremely unproductive when trying to sincerely discuss an issue.  When you see something you don’t agree with or someone tries to pick an argument with you over something you believe or do, take a second to assess your reaction.  Is your reaction based solely on defense, does the differing opinion actually cause someone harm, or is it simply different than yours? Reacting without reflecting can cause a cascade of negativity.  Something that no one needs, especially busy moms! Plus, if it leaves you in a bad mood it may be affecting your baby.

Have empathy.

As you now know, being a mom requires all the support you can get.  This is true for all mothers no matter what walk of life they choose.  As you come across discussions online, keep this in mind. Try to put yourself in the other mother’s shoes to see if there is any validity in their differing viewpoint (and hope that they will do the same with you). Even if you still disagree (which is totally ok) and feel the need to comment, try to be constructive.  There is no point in tearing someone down for what they believe.  Try to get your point across in a way that is supportive and helpful without coming across as superior. On the other hand, if someone is trying to tear you down try to respond in a way that promotes discussion rather than argument, even if this requires you to be the “bigger person.”

Social Media Detox

If you take the two ideas above into consideration and continue to find being online overwhelming, it may be time for a detox.  This might mean limiting your exposure to social media each day. It could also mean getting rid of certain social media platforms temporarily (or, even for good) or unfollowing certain people and groups that aren’t benefiting you.  What and how you choose to read, follow and share your ideas is totally up to you.  Social media should be supporting you somehow in your daily life. Otherwise, you’re just letting the negativity of others drag you down for no reason.  

Discussion is important.

‘Agree to disagree’ is a popular statement for a reason.  If we all agreed on every issue out there, life would be pretty boring.  Keep this in mind as you take on each day and remember that most of us are trying to do the best we can.  Particularly as moms, we should be supporting each other and picking each other up when in need. So don’t be afraid to discuss! This is how we learn! This will not only make you a great role model for your kids but will build a world that is more positive for them to grow up and live in.

Want to be part of a supportive mom group? Check out the Spectra Baby USA blog and social media platforms.